


Star Across My Sky

by songsofgallifrey



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Eventual Smut, F/M, Mutant Reader, POV Second Person, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2019-07-06 14:27:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15887889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/songsofgallifrey/pseuds/songsofgallifrey
Summary: You've been through a lot trying to make a difference for the kids being experimented on by HYDRA. When you're cornered by a particularly heinous rogue and rescued by the Avengers, Bucky can't stop staring at your soulmark. And you can't help but wonder why he doesn't have one.





	1. Longing

**Author's Note:**

> Soulmate AU, Civil War didn't happen.
> 
> This is terrifying for me. Bucky is my new muse and this is the first time I have written anything substantial with him in it. This has been stuck in my head for months and I had to write it. I hope you like it.

“I told you, I don’t know anything!”

You clenched your teeth and closed your eyes, bracing yourself for the shock to come, and became alarmed when it didn’t. Dread dropped into your stomach like a block of ice as you opened your eyes again to see the man with the shaved head and octopus tattoo on his chin spread his lips wide in a twisted imitation of a smile. His thumb toyed with the button on the device in his hand that controlled your shock collar. Your heart skipped each time he paused over the button, anticipating the pain. The chair you were tied to was made of dry-rotted wood and it creaked with your every movement like it was going to give out.

“I didn’t believe you the first ten times you said it, girlie,” he sneered, with a laugh that slithered down your spine, “and I still don’t believe you.” 

The bald man was on the right track with you but you weren’t about to let  _ him  _ know that. The information you knew about the Enhanced kids that had escaped the rogue Hydra facility was too precious to land in the wrong hands and you would give your life if it meant Hydra couldn’t kidnap them again.

The man examined his nails and picked at the dirt on his fingers. “Oh I’m not gonna kill you,” he said calmly. “There are worse things, though. I’m sure you can think of a few.” 

What confidence you had gathered in the past few moments went up in smoke. You tried to swallow but your throat was too dry. Could he read your mind? Was he Enhanced too?

“Took ya long enough.” The man laughed as comprehension swept over your face.

You took a steadying breath and tried to wipe the fear from your eyes as you stared him down. “So you knew all this time and you just wanted to hear me say it,” you spat at him, your trembling knees threatening to give you away. “Why?”

He sighed impatiently. “Because, dumb shit, I may be able to hear your thoughts, but I have to make you say your power out loud for our records. As well as the location of the safe house for the kids - at least you’ve been smart enough not to think of that yet.” The man took your throat in the strong grip of his huge hand, just above the thin collar, and squeezed until you had to open your mouth and strain to take in a breath.

“I would sooner let you peel the skin off my bones before I told you any of that,” you choked out, the man’s face inches from yours. He increased the pressure of his grip the longer you spoke. “The longer you keep me here -” you winced and tried to swallow, the cartilage in your throat beginning to give way with a sickening crackling sound - “the farther those kids get away from  _ you _ .” your heart was pounding so hard you could hear it in your ears, and the sound nearly drowned out your own panicked inner voice as the man held up the controller and pushed the button with his thumb.

………..

“We’re a couple of minutes out, get your chutes ready.” Nat hit a few switches on the console, and Steve, Bucky, and Thor unbuckled themselves from their seats. 

“I just don’t think she’s out there,” Bucky said, distractedly fumbling with the clasps of the parachute pack on his back. “If she was, she probably died a long time ago, and I missed her. Or maybe I lost my right to have one when I was… well, you know what I did.” He flexed the metal fingers on his robotic arm and felt the plates creak as they shifted. “I don’t even have my mark anymore. They took it from me.”

Steve pointed at Bucky from across the Quinjet and frowned, his own chute pack ready to go. “Hey! You know that wasn’t really you. None of that was your fault. Stop beating yourself up about that.” 

“That’s easy for you to say, Steve. Your girl is waiting for you back at headquarters. And you were born 75 years before her.” Bucky got the clasp together and adjusted the straps. He didn’t particularly want to think about this right before a rescue mission, but it had been weighing on his mind and he could never hide anything from Steve. “Not everyone can be so lucky.”

“I share your pain, Mr. Barnes,” Thor spoke up from the door at the tail of the Quinjet. Since he could fly, he didn’t need a parachute. He examined the pattern on the side of his hammer as he continued. “As Gods, we tend to outlive our destined mates, especially if they are not Aesir - and a lot of time they aren’t.”

“Can we stay on task here, boys? You can chat about soulmates later but for now we have work to do.” Nat shot a look back at the three of them and winked. She had killed her own soulmate back when she was a spy in Russia, and it had taken her a long time to come to terms with it, Bucky remembered her telling him months ago. Now that it had been years since then, she somehow managed to have a sense of humor about it, and even had plastic surgery to remove her mark from her arm.

_ You’ll know when you see her,  _ Nat had said,  _ because it’ll feel like your heart is beating outside of your body and inside hers. You won’t be able to breathe. You’ll want to die and fly at the same time.  _

Bucky wanted more than anything to know how that felt. To  _ deserve  _ to know how that felt.

“How close are we?” Steve picked up his shield and threaded his arm through its straps. “If anyone is still stuck in there, that is - it took SHIELD long enough to tell us anything was going on. I bet the kids are long gone by now.”

“We’re less than thirty seconds from the landing site. You guys will make the jump, then I’ll land the Quinjet.” She put her finger to her ear. “Tony, you still out there?”

“No, I decided to go back home and order Chinese takeout,” Tony mumbled sarcastically into the intercom. He was flying alongside the Quinjet in case there were any stray planes that would attack them during their approach. “I know the plan, and I can see the house from here. FRIDAY can sense two human-shaped heat signatures, but there’s no one else there. We had better hurry though, one of them has erratic vitals.”

Bucky stared at his metal forearm and ran his fingers over the smooth inner plates where his soulmark used to be; he could have sworn it was itching, if it had been capable of such a thing, that is. Steve clapped a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it, giving him a gentle smile.

“It’s just another mission, Buck,” he assured him. “In and out. Save who needs to be saved. Then we’re back home.” Bucky smiled at him and nodded.

“It’s jump time!” Nat pushed a large button on the console and the rear door opened. Thor widened his stance, spun his hammer by the strap, and flew out with a  _ boom _ toward the house. A few seconds later Steve took his jump, followed by Bucky. 

The planned trajectory would take them to the yard outside of the house, and that’s where Bucky and Steve landed. Thor was waiting on the roof, Tony hovering in the air in case the Hydra agent escaped. Whoever was in there, he wasn’t getting out alive.

A woman’s blood-curdling scream pierced the silence of the night and made Bucky’s stomach lurch. His heart squeezed like it was going to burst from his ribs, and he fell down to one knee and clutched his chest as the others made their way inside. Gritting his teeth, he closed his eyes and bit back the urge to yell out his pain. His metal arm felt like it was submerged in molten lead. Steve turned and saw Bucky, and motioned to Thor to go ahead and go in. He kneeled next to Bucky and leaned in close.

“Buck, what’s wrong?!”

Bucky took a few deep breaths and rose to his feet. “Nothing,” he groaned, though he could hardly convince himself. “Let’s go.”

“You sure?”

Bucky pushed past Steve and held his gun up to his shoulder. “Let’s do this,” he insisted.

Tony’s voice came over the earpiece. “Everything okay down there, Cap? Old man having a heart attack?” He chuckled, and Bucky raised his fist in Tony’s general direction with his middle finger up. “Keep it feisty, old-timer,” he said, and returned the gesture with a laugh.

Bucky and Steve stalked silently through the living room of the ramshackle house, shoulder to shoulder, waiting for a signal from Thor. Bucky and Steve flattened their bodies against the wall next to the doorway, and Bucky was close enough to peer inside unseen. Thor was standing tall in the middle of the floor with his hammer pointed at a man with a bald head and a small controller in his hand. In a chair next to him was a terrified young woman with a collar around her neck, tied to the crumbling chair with rope around her wrists, calves, and ankles. 

“Release her,” Thor demanded, “or I will be forced to crush you with the might of Mjolnir’s power.”

The bald man chuckled and held up the controller. “Kill me,” he sneered, “and the instant my fingerprint is no longer on this device will be the instant it delivers a fatal shock to my new friend here.” He gestured to the girl in the chair. Her lips were pursed shut and her eyes were wide, darkened by fury. 

Steve and Bucky burst into the room, Bucky taking aim with his rifle and Steve readying his shield for a throw. In one swift movement the girl took advantage of her captor’s diverted attention, breaking one arm of the brittle wooden chair and swinging it upward - still tied to her wrist - with enough force to drop the bald man bonelessly to the floor as it connected with his jaw with a resounding  _ crack _ . The remote dropped from his limp hand and beeped rapidly three times, but before it had time to deliver its fatal shock Thor rushed over and tore it from her throat, crushing the battery pack in his grip.

“Thank you,” the woman sighed, staring up at each man with a weak smile. “A distraction is just what I needed.”

“That was a hell of an impressive move,” Steve said with an edge of genuine awe. “Looks like we got here just in time.”

“ _ What’s going on down there? _ ” Tony’s voice came through Bucky’s earpiece. “ _ Everyone stopped moving.” _

“Target is unconscious,” Steve informed him. “The other person was a woman and he was torturing her.”

“ _ Damn, that was fast. Nice work. I’ll get Nat back here with the Quinjet. _ ”

“Bucky, can you go ahead and untie her please? See if she can walk? Thor can take baldy here back to the jet and I can go check the perimeter.”

Nodding briefly, Bucky slung his gun on his back and approached the woman in the chair as Thor exited the room with the unconscious man slung over his shoulder and Steve on his heels. She looked exhausted, and he could see the raw, bloody skin on her wrists and the shock burns around her neck. Bucky wondered how long she had been here, how long she had been subjected to torture at the hands of this rogue HYDRA agent. It appeared as though she hadn’t eaten or slept in days. Rage bubbled in Bucky’s stomach like acid at the thought of her suffering, even not knowing who she was. He couldn’t stand anyone being at the mercy of HYDRA’s sadistic agenda. She was resting her head on the back of the chair, staring at the ceiling, blinking slowly as though she was about to fall asleep, and Bucky could swear he could hear her heartbeat as he stood in front of her. In some strange way he felt like he knew her from somewhere, a tingle of familiarity in the back of his mind making him frown.

“Hey,” Bucky said quietly. The girl snapped her head up to look at him and tilted her head, studying his face carefully. “I’m Bucky. Is it okay if I get the ropes off for you?”

“Yeah, thanks,” she murmured, distracted. Bucky retrieved a knife from his thigh holster and sawed through the rope on her right arm, the one still held tight to the chair. She winced and held her arm close to her chest while Bucky worked on her left. 

“I’m (Y/N), by the way.”

Whatever Bucky was going to say next got stuck in his throat. After untying (Y/N)’s left arm and moving the broken arm of the chair away, he caught a brief but clear glimpse of the mark on her forearm and his heart nearly stopped.

A dark brown star, about the size of a baseball, showed just under the bend of her elbow.

Just like his had been.


	2. Rusted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In darkness, the truth comes out. But not all are ready for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been 84 years but it's finally here! This was a bit of a filler chapter but there's still cool stuff going on. I hope you like!

Sinking gratefully into the padded seat on the jet, you watched Captain America -  _ the actual Captain America, who insisted you call him Steve -  _ as he fastened your seatbelts together at your waist and explained that they were taking you back to their compound, Tony Stark’s huge tower in New York City. The rogue lay passed out on the floor only a few feet away, his wrists and ankles cuffed together and secured with a chain to the walls in case he woke up, and you fought an urge to unbuckle your restraint and give him a swift kick to the face. Steve smiled at you when you thanked him and he touched his forehead with the tips of his fingers, insisting it was their job and he was happy to do it. He excused himself and joined Bucky where he sat behind the pilot seat talking to the redheaded woman at the controls, who had introduced herself as Natasha. 

Bucky, who had avoided talking to you since he cut the ropes off of you and helped you to stand up, was a bit of a mystery to you. He had walked you to the jet with his metal arm holding you up as you leaned into him for support, and showed genuine concern for you every step of the way, and maybe it was gratitude over being rescued or the intensity of your fatigue, but being that close to him was comforting in a way you hadn’t felt before. You couldn’t make sense of the warmth in your chest that grew every time he looked at you with a blush creeping up his stubbled cheeks, or why he was staring so intently at your mark once you got to the jet. Feeling self conscious and blaming shock, you placed your arm into your lap and wrapped yourself tighter in the blanket they gave you. Staring out of the front window of the jet was easier than trying to figure him out just yet, but you still stole a few glances to get a good look at him. 

Bucky was handsome, in a rugged, edgy sort of way. Expressive slate blue eyes peered out from behind loose strands of long brown hair that had fallen from the small bun tied at the base of his neck, and he had a broad and masculinely angled jaw. The corner of his heart shaped mouth turned up in a cute embarrassed smile that made your heart skip when he looked up and saw you were looking at him, but it faded after a moment. You guessed maybe he had spent time in the military at one point, with the way his body was built, from his barrel chest to his strong legs, and you were impressed with the way he was able to balance on the balls of his feet with ease as he squatted behind Natasha’s seat. What drew your attention most was his left arm, which was not an arm but a metal prosthetic made of many different articulating plates that moved like a regular arm. On the shoulder was a worn and fading red star.

Something in you urged you to find out more about Bucky. There was something familiar about him that you needed to figure out. 

“Are you comfortable?” Thor’s voice made you jump and he held his hands up with a smile to calm you as he sat down next to you. “My apologies, I didn’t intend to startle you. I just wanted to make sure you weren’t still cold. Here, you can have this until we get back.” He unclasped his long red cape and draped it over your body, the light fabric surprisingly warm even through the blanket. You offered him a smile and he sat his hammer down on the floor of the jet, placing one of his massive hands on your knee.

“I’m tougher than I look,” you assured him. “All that mattered was getting those kids to safety.”

“I admire your strength.”

“Says the literal god of thunder whose biceps are bigger than my head.”

Thor laughed heartily at your joke. “One of my greatest friends is a woman, named Sif, and she is a mighty warrior. My mother, Queen Frigga, was one of the strongest wielders of magic in the whole of the Nine Realms. I am no stranger to the strength of women, yourself included.”

You lowered your eyes to stare at the rogue, rage forcing adrenaline through your veins at the thought of what he could have done to those kids, had your team not found them in time. “I’ve faced a lot worse than him,” you said quietly. “A lot of the time men like him will look at me and think I’m weak or vulnerable. They’re wrong. I’ve seen the experiments they do, and I’m not about to allow any of them to get away with it.” You looked back at Thor, who was watching you with furrowed eyebrows. “That’s not to say I’m not grateful you guys showed up. I think that was the first time in a long time that I wasn’t sure I’d make it out. But it would have been worth it for the kids and my team, they got out safely and no one else knows where they’ve gone.”

“That would have been a hell of a loss,” Steve spoke up from behind the cockpit. You hadn’t realized he and the others were listening, and you were sure your face turned about twelve shades of red. “Self sacrifice. Willingness to put your life on the line for what you believe in. You may not see it but you’re a hero to those kids.”

“Buckle up, everyone,” Natasha called over her shoulder. She sighed impatiently. “Thor, I’m gonna need you to pick up the hammer please. It’s keeping us from taking off.”

Thor laughed and picked up the hammer, placing it in his lap with a smirk as you eyed it curiously, and you heard the jet’s engines roar to life as the craft lifted into the air. Steve and Bucky took a seat across from you, on either side of where the rogue was still lying unconscious on the floor.

The flight back to New York was short, especially with the four literal legends keeping you company, and the one you still weren’t sure about. Steve and Bucky bantered like brothers, and if the voice coming over the intercom was any indication of Tony Stark’s personality, you couldn’t wait to meet him.

You couldn’t help but notice that Thor kept his arm around your shoulders on the flight back, and the sad look on Bucky’s face that he tried to hide for the whole flight.

…………………………..

_ No.  _ It was  _ impossible. _ Ludicrous. Insane. 

“I’m telling you, Buck, it looks exactly like yours did.”

Bucky stared at his metal forearm and swore under his breath. “Did you see the way she looked at me, Steve? She’s disgusted. There’s no way. It has to be wrong.” He leaned over the balcony railing and looked down to the city below, his eyes not really focusing on anything in particular. He couldn’t get you out of his head and it was driving him crazy. 

“Is it really that hard for you to believe there’s someone for you out there?” Steve spoke quietly as he approached Bucky and propped his hip against the railing.

“She looked at me like I’m some kind of ghost,” Bucky whispered. “A freak. A monster. She knows who I was. She’ll never trust me, let alone believe she could be my  _ soulmate _ .” 

“You don’t know that.”

“My past isn’t exactly a secret anymore,” Bucky reminded him. “Not since I’ve lived here. Just like Nat. Everyone knows.” 

He sighed and thought of you, upstairs, asleep in one of the spare rooms. It had been a last-minute arrangement once Bruce had ensured you were physically okay and didn’t need any serious medical intervention, and Tony had offered to fly you wherever you needed to go but insisted that you didn’t have to leave yet if you didn’t want to. You had chosen to at least stay the night and think about it after you had had some sleep. You didn’t want to leave until the rogue was taken care of, and SHIELD was going to pick him up in the morning. Now it was in the middle of the night and Bucky couldn’t shut off his brain - again - so he had made his way down to the balcony to watch the night pass. Steve understood better than anyone why his best friend couldn’t sleep. 

“And, just like Nat,” Steve said quietly, “there will always be people who believe the lies, and people who see the victim.”

Bucky bristled. “I’m  _ not  _ a victim.”

“You know what I mean.”

A light breeze swept over the balcony, carrying with it the sounds of the city. It was still warm since it was late in the summer, and Bucky was starting to feel uncomfortable in his tactical suit. “Go get some sleep, Captain,” he mumbled. “I’m gonna lay out here on one of the chairs and see who gets up first in a few hours. Ten bucks says it’s Banner.” Steve smiled and patted Bucky on the shoulder before going back inside; he knew there was no pressing the issue if Bucky didn’t want to open up about it and sometimes it was better to leave him to think on his own.

Bucky removed the outer layer of his suit until he was down to just the pants and undershirt, and unlaced his boots with practiced movements. He slowly walked over to his favorite chaise that was situated in the corner, setting his boots on the floor beside it and laying down with his legs stretched out and his jacket under his head. Again he felt the uncomfortable pulsing of heat through his metal arm and pulled it to his body, cradling it with his flesh arm. 

His mind raced with questions; what did all of this mean? Why was his arm burning? Why did he get an ache in his chest every time he was near you? Why was his mind pulling him doggedly back to you every time he tried to think of something else? 

And why did he want nothing more in the entire world than to go upstairs, climb into the bed with you, and hold you in his arms?

The impulse felt crude and intrusive - yes, you were beautiful, no one could deny that. And Bucky couldn’t remember the last time he had just held someone in his arms. But he didn’t know you, and there was no way in hell he was going to pressure you into something you probably didn’t want by telling you about his mark. The last thing he wanted was for you to think you were obligated to feel something for someone like him just because your marks were the same.

He couldn’t get out of his head the look on your face when you were on the jet and saw him looking at you; embarrassment, or was that shame? You  _ had  _ to know who he was, otherwise why were you avoiding him like the plague? 

Too many questions, no answers, and still the matter remained whether he was capable of even being on the receiving end of anything more than platonic interest or manipulative violence. More days than not, he believed HYDRA had frozen his heart when they froze his body, stripped him of the most human part of him, left him empty of emotion.

But the longer Bucky laid there and stared at the night sky, feeling the warm breeze as it pushed his hair around, the more he realized he wanted to be around you. He had barely spoken a few sentences to you, and you had hesitated and brushed him off when he offered to help you to your room, but damn him, it was going to drive him crazy if he didn’t talk to you again. 

Now that his mind was made up, Bucky finally felt the pull of fatigue and closed his heavy eyes, the image of your face seared into his brain as he fell asleep. 

…………………………..

You rolled over in your sleep, mumbling unintelligibly as sweat gathered on your brow. Something wasn’t right, but your mind couldn’t figure out what it was.

_ “What is this place?”  _

_ The question was solely for your own benefit, since you didn’t see anyone else around. A massive oak tree stood proud on the top of a hill, surrounded by seemingly endless fields of bright green grass and small white flowers. The sun shone low on the horizon, casting the field in a pleasant golden yellow light. You bent down to look at the flowers and you were surprised to see you weren’t wearing any shoes. Some small part of your mind knew you hadn’t been here before, but it was still glaringly familiar. _

_ “I’ve been expecting you, doll,” a masculine voice came from behind the tree, and when you looked up you saw a handsome young man, perhaps 25 or so years old, coming around the tree trunk and leaning casually against it. He had short, slicked-back chestnut hair, soft blue eyes, and the most kissable red lips you had ever seen on a man. Light stubble framed his square jaw. He was wearing impeccably pressed khaki slacks and brown boots, with a button-down white long sleeved shirt, the sleeves rolled halfway up his forearms. You could see a dark brown mark in the crook of his elbow but from this distance you couldn’t tell what it was. A smile pulled up the corner of those lips as his eyes raked over you, and he bit his lip, raising his eyebrow to beckon you over.  _

_ You didn’t hesitate, instinct making your legs taking control as you ran as fast as you could towards him through the grass until you were in his arms. He wrapped one arm around your waist and cupped his other hand on the back of your neck, resting his forehead on yours. You felt so light that you swore you could fly if you thought about it hard enough, and your heart was hammering in your chest like it was trying to escape its cage and join his. _

_ “I was beginnin’ to think you’d keep me waitin’ forever,” he murmured tenderly. “Been here a long time. Thought you’d never come, darlin’.” _

_ Slowly you took his arm from around your waist and examined it, your fingers tracing over the mark on his forearm. It was a star, just like yours.  _

_ You raised your head and tilted it to the side, rising up on your tiptoes to press your lips to his - _

You woke with a start, sitting straight up in the unfamiliar bed with your hand over your chest, trying to still your racing heart and control your breathing. You were still wearing Thor’s shirt, the thing swimming on you, and when you looked to the window you saw it was still dark outside, with just a touch of pink and yellow from the approaching dawn.

_ What the fucking hell was that about?! _

You weren’t sure why but the dream had shaken you. There was no way you would be able to go back to sleep. With a sigh you threw your legs over the side of the bed and stood up, your aching muscles and the raw skin on your wrists and ankles protesting with every move. You retrieved your pants from where Thor had placed them on the bedside chair and exited the room after putting them on, padding your way down the silent hall to the common room in your bare feet. Since your power enabled you to see perfectly in the thick darkness, you didn’t bother to turn on any lights and risk waking anyone up.

_ Caffeine _ , you thought.  _ Caffeine first, life and its bullshit second. _

After popping into the kitchen to grab a soda from the fridge, you walked out onto the balcony to watch the sunrise. It was early but the city was already bustling with activity, and the wind blowing up this high in the air was nice and cool. An itch in the back of your mind made you turn around and your heart leapt up into your throat when you saw Bucky stretched out on one of the lounge chairs, thrashing his head back and forth with a distressed look on his face.

“Bucky?” You said it quietly so you wouldn’t startle him, but he didn’t hear you, so you tried again a little louder. A shudder went through your body when his body stiffened and he spoke your name, clear as day. 

Shaken, you dashed back into the house and down the hall to where Steve had shown you his room was. You raised your closed hand and knocked softly three times, and within a few seconds the door opened to reveal a sleepy Steve pulling his shirt on. He saw your expression and followed you out into the hall. Wordlessly you took his wrist, no longer caring who he was, and pulled him behind you until you reached the balcony.

………………………..

_ What the hell? _

_ Bucky looked down at his hands - one flesh, one metal, both covered in blood - and back up again, seeing your terrified face as you backed away from him.  _

_ “I have to do this!” he shouted, his lips forming the words of their own accord. “They’ll never hurt you again! They’ll never hurt any of us again!” _

_ Her lips did not move but her voice drifted softly to his ears from somewhere behind him. “Bucky?” _

_ He called out her name, and his vision faded to darkness. _

“NO!” Bucky cried out as he awoke, swinging his metal arm into the darkness. Someone grabbed his wrist and he looked around until he saw Steve’s face. 

“Christ, Rogers. Why did you wake me up?!” Bucky jerked his arm out of Steve’s grip and sat up with his elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hands. 

“(Y/N) came and got me. She said you were having a bad dream.”

Bucky groaned and grasped his hair, pulling on it until it hurt. “I… “ He sighed, squeezing his eyes shut. “I haven’t had a dream in fuckin’ forever, Steve. Decades.”

“You should have seen yourself, Buck -”

“Until now.”

That took Steve by surprise. He furrowed his eyebrows and put his hand on Bucky’s arm. “What was it about?”

Bucky turned his head and stared at Steve instead of answering. He sat up straight when he saw you over Steve’s shoulder, standing at the railing and watching him. Looking at you made him feel like he had two hearts beating inside his chest, and since you were standing there with your hand over your chest he had to wonder if you felt it too. It scared the hell out of him.

………………………………….

As Steve and Bucky talked in private, you watched through the windows, studying Bucky’s face. His hair had fallen loose out of the bun and draped loosely over his shoulders, and you couldn’t help but stare at his hands while he talked. He had very expressive hands, just like his eyes. 

_ His eyes. _

In your mind’s eye you saw the man in your dream, gazing down at you. Those striking blue eyes. That jaw. Those lips. You thought about his soulmark, running your fingertips over your own. For most of your life, until you were an adult, your mother had told you that you would dream about your soulmate the night after you met them. The man in your dream looked just like Bucky, if Bucky had shorter hair and shaved. Your heart began to race as your mind ran away with the idea - was Bucky your soulmate? 

But Bucky didn’t have a mark. And even if he used to have one on his left arm, it was gone now. Did that mean he didn’t have a soulmate anymore? If you lose your mark, do you lose your soulmate? 

“I daresay my tunic looks better on you than on me. Is something troubling you, my lady?” 

Thor’s voice interrupted your train wreck of thoughts and you were grateful for the distraction. “No,” you lied, “I just didn’t get much sleep and I was thinking about what I wanted to get or make for breakfast.” You saw Bucky nod and Steve helped him up off of the chaise. The two made their way toward the glass door and you deliberately looked away as they came in, since you didn’t want them to know you had been watching. Of course, they would know anyway if they saw the red tinge of your ears. The pounding of your heart nearly drowned out the conversation Thor was trying to carry with you, and you didn’t want to admit that you wanted to follow wherever Bucky and Steve were going. 

“If it’s not too forward,” Thor offered, “I learned a few years ago how to make Midgardian bacon and eggs.” 

“I don’t know what Midgardian means,” you admitted, trying to will away the fullness in your chest as Bucky walked by, “but bacon and eggs sounds good. And coffee.”

“I love coffee!” You stood up and followed Thor to the kitchen as he began a story about his time in New Mexico. Looking over your shoulder, you met Bucky’s eyes as he turned to look at you at the same time. You smiled, your heart tripping over itself when he gave you a surprised look and smiled back.


	3. Seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big plans are set in motion to capture and take out the rogue camp, but you and Bucky aren't sure about how the other feels. Steve knows an idiot when he sees one. Or two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been 84 years... but my most elusive muse is speaking to me after seeing Endgame. Comments are always greatly appreciated! Feedback is love!

By midday one of SHIELD’s operative teams came to retrieve the rogue in a secure jet, and you watched him like a hawk as they led him through the halls and onto the roof. His arms were cuffed in three places behind his back, and he had cuffs around his ankles that kept him from running away, but still he bared his teeth at you in what could be considered a smile when he passed you. The sadistic maniac may have been in custody but you knew in your gut that it wasn’t over.

It was never that easy.

After the handoff you made your way back downstairs and went out on the balcony to think. While it was true that you were thankful that the kids were safe, you really wanted to see them for yourself, and to track down the rogues that had escaped. You could easily take Tony Stark’s offer and use one of his personal aircrafts, but you didn’t have the first clue where to go; you knew the location of the new safe house, but you were more interested in finding wherever the rogues were hiding and taking them out once and for all.

Like it or not, as much as you didn’t want to impose on the Avengers any longer, you knew you needed their help.

And then there was the nagging feeling that you needed to stay anyway, the pull you sensed ever since you met Bucky that made you want to slow down and anchor yourself here. It went against everything you had fought for all these years, to want to end the fight and just… be.

You sighed, leaning your elbows on the balcony railings, your mind drifting to the night before, and your dream. Tilting your head, you could see the chaise that Bucky had slept on, his jacket still crumpled up on the end. Hearing him call out your name in his sleep had been strange, to say the least. He had sounded desperate and afraid; if he really was your soulmate like your dream had said, wouldn’t he have been having the same dream as you did? Yours had been peaceful, but Bucky had seemed like he was having a nightmare.

The glass doors leading into the common room slid open behind you and you turned around to see Bucky coming out on the balcony toward the chaise. He picked up the tactical jacket and looked up to see you, and he smiled warmly when he made eye contact with you.

There was that feeling again, the sensation coming straight from your chest like a strong magnetic pull. Your stomach clenched as the sound of a heartbeat pounded in your ears. You inhaled deeply and swallowed hard as he approached you.

“Hey, are you gonna stick around after all?” he asked, and you noticed his flesh thumb stroking the metal one nervously.

“I, uh, maybe for a little while,” you admitted, trying not to focus on what felt like a second heartbeat pounding in your chest. “I was going to leave but…” You trailed off, looking out over the balcony and back to Bucky’s eyes. This close you could definitely tell they were the same eyes from your dream, and the mark on your arm was starting to tingle. It was getting hard to think straight when your instincts were screaming at you to throw your arms around him just like in the dream.

“Yeah I get ya.” Bucky nodded his head in understanding. “I just wanted to thank you for what you did last night. And I’m sorry you had to see me like that.”

“Don’t worry about it. We all have bad dreams.”

“Yeah, but…” Bucky tilted his head, one eyebrow raised. “Did you have a bad dream too?”

A whole field of butterflies fluttered around in your stomach as you tried to form an answer. “Not exactly,” you said carefully. Your hand came up to absently cover your mark. “It’s a funny story actually -”

“Lady (Y/N)! Just the person I was looking for.” Thor came out onto the balcony with a smile, leaning casually against the glass door with your shirt over one arm. “Would you care to join me for some lunch? Mister Stark also offered to pay for you to buy some new clothes, and I would be happy to escort you.”

You looked to Bucky, as though subconsciously asking for permission. His cheeks flushed pink and he turned to lean on the balcony railing. “I’ll tell you later, if you want,” you offered, and he peered over his shoulder at you with a shy smile.

“I’d like that.”

…………………

Coming down the hallway from what had become your temporary bedroom, you nearly cringed when you smelled the aroma of sizzling bacon - a smell that normally made your stomach growl, but since Thor had enthusiastically presented you with a plate full of nearly a pound of bacon and half a dozen eggs every morning for more than two weeks, it was starting to get old.

“Ah, (Y/N)! There you are!” Tony’s voice came from behind you and you turned around to see his smiling face. You had to stifle a laugh at his red and gold striped silk pajama bottoms as he walked toward you, scratching a spot just under his nanotech arc reactor on his bare chest. He shoved a mug of coffee into your hands and pushed you back down the hall toward the elevator before you were able to ask what was going on.

 _Thank god, no bacon_ , you thought, taking a grateful sip of the coffee. It was overly sweet and tasted burned, and you tried to politely hide the sputtering cough you let out at the taste.

“Oh, right, that one was mine,” Tony said calmly, taking the mug out of your hands as the elevator opened and downing the whole thing in a few large gulps before going inside. You frowned at him and followed along, but he just smiled back at you like it was typical. “Coffee is coffee. FRIDAY, take us up to the lab, I want to show our new friend here something I think she’ll like.”

The elevator took off upwards, and you watched Tony with growing curiosity as he began to bounce on the balls of his bare feet and bite his lip with excitement.

“What’s got you so riled up this early in the morning?” you asked him as the elevator began to slow.

“You’ll see.”

The doors opened in Tony’s lab and Bruce looked up from the computer he was sitting at, waving excitedly with Nat looking over his shoulder. “C’mere, you gotta see this,” he shouted, nearly breathless. “Took ya long enough to get her, Tony!”

“Sorry, Bruce, had to practically pry Thor away with a crowbar.” Tony winked at you and took another sip of his revolting coffee as he led you to the computer. “We know it’s not your birthday, but… _voila_.”

You leaned down over Bruce’s shoulder to get a closer look and gasped when you recognized the area. “Wait, is that -”

“The rogue camp, that’s right.” Nat placed her hand on your shoulder and her smile got even bigger. “We took the location you told us old baldy had said and we started combing the area for, well, anything.”

“Cell phone signals, wi-fi access, radio waves, you name it.” Bruce yawned and pointed at the screen where a yellow pulsating dot with the label ‘assholes’ was. “They downed an acre or so of trees and set up camp there. Tony managed to hack into satellites and confirm the location with high-powered infrared cameras.”

Tony piped up from behind you. “Don’t thank me or anything.”

“Don’t worry, we won’t,” said Nat, giving you a playful nudge with her elbow.

All you could do was stare at the yellow dot on the screen. Finally, after all these years, all the kids you saved and the partners you had lost, this was it. The chance to wipe every last one of them out in one fell swoop was in your grasp and it was all you could do to contain yourself. You blinked and felt a tear slide down your cheek.

_Time to send them all to hell._

“So when are we leaving?”

Tony grinned wide from behind his coffee cup. “Two days. Pack your bags, Riddick.”

……………………

The smell of coffee hit Bucky like a brick wall as he walked blindly into the kitchen, still half asleep. He managed to open one eye enough to see Steve standing in front of the coffee pot and grunted in his direction. Steve laughed at the state of his friend but nodded in understanding, reaching up into the cabinet for a second, larger cup and pouring a bunch of sugar into it.

“Long night?”

Bucky grunted again and leaned his back against the counter. In the corner of his limited vision he saw Thor sitting on a barstool, eating enough bacon and eggs for an army. Not wishing to be reminded of his jealousy, he turned the other way to face Steve and tried to open his eyes all the way. Wordlessly Steve poured them both a cup of coffee when the pot was finished brewing. It wasn’t until Bucky heard Thor put his plate in the sink and walk away that he said anything.

“Doesn’t he have a kingdom to rule or something?”

Steve took a long sip from his black coffee and nodded. “That bad, huh?”

“Not really, I just -” Bucky downed half his cup while he thought over his next words carefully. He tapped his metal fingers on the mug so hard he almost broke it. “How can someone so nice be so oblivious?”

It didn’t take much observation for Steve to figure out that Bucky had been mulling over this for days, if not weeks. The circles under his eyes had not been so dark in ages.

“This isn’t about Thor, is it?”

A few unintelligible grumbles informed Steve he was right.

“I’m still havin’ those dreams,” Bucky admitted. He ran his fingers through his unwashed hair and set his mug down with a sigh. “That’s 17 nights in a row now. They’re gettin’ better, not violent anymore, but it’s always… it’s always her.”

“You need to tell her.”

Bucky shook his head and stared at his feet. “You really think a girl like her is gonna react well when someone like me says _hey, we just met a couple weeks ago but I can’t stop dreaming about you and I think you might be my soulmate_? Her work is her life. I respect that. I respect _her_ too much to lay something like that on her shoulders.”

Steve said nothing, and when Bucky finally looked at him all he did was blink.

“What?”

“You’re an idiot.”

Bucky studied his metal forearm, where his mark used to be. “No arguments there.”

“Finish your coffee, I have something up in my room I think you’d like to see.”

Bucky stared down at his mug on the counter. All that was left in it was a sip or two of coffee and the sugar at the bottom that didn’t dissolve and was now congealing into a sticky mess.

“Is it more coffee?”

Steve laughed and put his arm around Bucky’s shoulders, leading him toward the elevator down the hall. A few floors up, Bucky could swear he heard your excited voice through the floors above as he and Steve got out of the elevator and made their way to the room Steve shared with his wife Marilyn. He wondered what was going on up there in Tony’s lab, because he knew there would only be a couple of things that would make you _that_ excited.

“Marilyn is visiting her mom in Brooklyn today, so she’s not here, but she was the one who found this.” Steve pulled a weathered brown box out from the top of the storage closet in their living room and opened it to reveal a yellowing photo album with the words “Rogers Family” embroidered on the cover. “I completely forgot I had this. For some reason the Smithsonian got their hands on this in the 60s and kept it so they’d have pictures of me to show in the museum, but I got it back when I came out of the ice and had SHIELD to help me sort out the legal stuff.”

Flipping a few more pages, Steve found the picture he was looking for and held it up for Bucky to see. “Marilyn reminded me I still had this picture of you from 1934. Come look.”

Stunned, Bucky shambled across the room and stood next to Steve, taking the fragile album into his own hands so he could see it better. Sure enough, on the right side of the page was a picture Bucky had only the faintest memory of. He was standing shirtless, leaning on one arm against a tree next to a lake with a cocky smile on his face. Next to the picture in Sarah Rogers’ loopy and neat handwriting was a note - “ _Bucky at Lake George, age 17_ ”.

“Wow,” Bucky whispered. He felt Steve’s hand squeeze his shoulder as his fingers traced his left arm in the photo. His mark, darkened by the sun, stood out against the lighter color of his skin. Suddenly it was hard to swallow.

“I think she likes Thor though, have you seen -”

“Listen, okay?” Steve’s voice got very quiet. “I thought the same thing you did, that if I _did_ have a soulmate, they would have lived back in our time and would be dead already. But guess what? The universe doesn’t give a damn about life and death.” He let Bucky think for a moment before continuing. “Soulmates always come back. Always. That’s how it works. Everyone gets one. If you don’t meet them in this life, you’ll meet them in another. This is your chance.”

Steve gently lifted the black and white photo from the page and held it close to Bucky’s face, forcing him to see himself.

“You look at that and tell me again you don’t think you’re right for her.”

………………….

Less than 36 hours until it was time to leave, and every second felt longer than the last, the more you kept thinking about it. Excitement and nerves bubbled under your skin and it wasn’t until late afternoon when your stomach started growling loudly while watching rush-hour traffic from the balcony that you remembered you never ate any breakfast after going up to the lab, or lunch later. You tore yourself away from the balcony when you heard a commotion inside, circled around Thor.

“Are you sure you have to go?” Tony asked with an edge of sarcasm. It was no secret that the two of them felt like they constantly had to show each other up to prove themselves as superior. The only two people on the team who could fly, and they kept butting heads. You rolled your eyes as you came through the glass door, absentmindedly rubbing your tingling mark.

Thor, of course, did not pick up on Tony’s tone. “My apologies to everyone here, I know I would prove quite useful in taking out these - what did you call them? - rogues, but I am needed in Asgard as soon as I can get there.” He noticed you coming in and winked at you. “I promise to return as soon as I can.”

You hung back and watched everyone else say their goodbyes and finally Thor headed past you out onto the balcony and toward the rooftop, to the spot that Tony had reinforced so it was safe for Thor to use his space-y teleportation rainbow…thing. You weren’t entirely sure how it worked but it wasn’t your business. He used his hammer to fly up to the roof and within a few seconds he was gone in a flash of light. Was that feeling in your chest relief?

“I gotta say, I’m gonna miss the big lug.” Steve crossed the room and leaned against the wall next to you once everyone else had left. “He’s started to grow on me.”

You snorted in an attempt to hold back your laughter. “Yeah, like a wart.”

Steve had to laugh at that. “I’m sure you’ve had enough bacon to last the rest of your life, huh?”

 _That’s Steve, always cuts past the bullshit._ “Yeah I guess so,” you admitted. “Hey, um, where’s -”

“He went for a jog about an hour ago.” Steve smiled knowingly and crossed his arms. “Should be back before dinner, since he’s cooking tonight.”

“What, did that supersoldier serum give you psychic powers or something?” You stared at your feet so he wouldn’t see the blush creeping up your cheeks. Even when Bucky’s name wasn’t mentioned, you still had a schoolgirl reaction when you talked about him. Dreaming about him every night hadn’t helped, either. It seemed like every time you closed your eyes now, all you could see was him, waiting for you under that tree. It felt so foreign to you, obsessing over someone you just met like you were star-crossed teenagers.

Steve shook his head. “It doesn’t take a psychic to know who you were thinking about.” You wanted to deny it but you knew he wouldn’t buy it for a second. “See? I was right, wasn’t I?”

“I plead the fifth.”

“Look, I’m gonna say it, since no one else around here will. Bucky’s your soulmate, and you are his. That much I know.”

A hollow feeling crept into your chest and Bucky’s smiling face flashed through your mind’s eye again. But that face wasn’t real, and the only smiles you had seen on Bucky’s face since that first morning out on the balcony had vanished every time you came into the same room as him. He was making it pretty clear that if he _was_ your - you couldn’t bring yourself to think the word again, for the millionth time - then he wasn’t very happy about it.

“Even if he is, and I’m not saying he is,” you said slowly, “I must have said or done something to put him off, because he’s been avoiding me. In over two weeks he’s hardly said a dozen words to me. I’d rather not push it.”

Steve chuckled to himself and started digging in the pocket of his jeans. “God I wish you could have heard the conversation he and I had this morning. He thinks you like Thor.”

“ _What_?!”

“Look, I have something you’ll want to see. I showed it to him this morning and I think you deserve to see it too. This might help you make a decision before we go get the rogues. Here.”

You took a faded black and white photograph from Steve’s hands and nearly dropped it when you saw what it was. A slightly younger, but not less handsome, Bucky leaned against a very familiar tree, his clearly-star-shaped mark, identical to yours, on full display. He looked almost exactly like in your dream. You turned it over, expecting a label or some writing on the back, but it was blank, so you turned it back to study it. Your heart began to race as something triggered deep in the back of your mind, like a buried memory of years long passed. Two words spilled out of your lips of their own volition before you could stop them.

“Lake George.”


End file.
